Review: "THE FUTURE IS HERE AND EVERYTHING NEEDS TO BE DESTROYED" by The Armed

If you're going to name an album after an internet meme, you better pick a banger. Imagine the ignominy of releasing "In Doge We Trust," already well past its sell-by date in 2021, but with far greater indignities yet to come.

But The Armed came out guns blazing with "THE FUTURE IS HERE AND EVERYTHING NEEDS TO BE DESTROYED," a social media classic meme owing to an industrial shredding company getting a little too grandiose for their work. And what a fitting origin to title this ludicrous shrieking buzzsaw of an album.

What starts out abrasive as all hell with jagged cybergrind gives way to melodic soundscapes reminiscent of the best of Genghis Tron, melodic gazey passages that recall the ever-elusive band Pyramids, and freaky chaotic free jazz. But it's not an incoherent genre-salad. Viewed through the lens of the album title, "THE FUTURE IS HERE" feels like the only logical response to the present moment: awash in technology for good and for ill and dehumanizing oneself to beat the horrors of modern existence to the punch.

What better reponse could there be to the era of ever-accelerating crisis? If this is the future, let's destroy it.

Released on Sargent House on August 1, 2025
(bandcamp)